November 9 update.
Hi! I was going to apologize because it's been a hot minute, but I don't have to. There's no point writing unless and until you have something to say, and I was too busy doing other stuff that drew me in more.
I did actually write a bit in the meantime. I coughed up a ~2k word draft for a short video in about two hours. The topic was basic advice for people looking to keep having fun playing Tekken, but it was general enough to apply to most games. It's fine! I'm not interested in making the video right now. Maybe I'll post the script. Maybe I won't.
I am motivated right now to write a bit about the bits of the new Dragon Age I've been seeing get shared around. Nope, I haven't played it myself! So my opinion is both underinformed and possibly incorrect anyway. I think I can explore it maybe as an exploration of my gut reaction to what I've seen and talk about why I felt how I did. It's not a feeling of dislike, but an observation I had about what things do and don't feel trans-positive to me relative to where I am in regards to that. I'm sure that sounds unclear!
The election happened, of course. The outcome was surprising, but within the realm of possibility. As always, I expect some things to change less than expected and other things to change way more than expected. I'm not happy, of course, but I wasn't going to be happy either way -- neither party has the capacity to address the roots of many of the problems people here face. They're simply too wedded to the capitalist mode of production to do so.
What does feel awful is the amount of LGBTQ children and young adults giving in to despair because they feel like open season has just been declared on their lives. And I kind of can't blame them for feeling that way. But the hostility against us from some people has always been intensifying since awareness of our existence hit the mainstream. People are forced to reckon with us and that rankles those who hate us. But as we continue to exist as living, breathing people in this world, most people have come to see us as people, not threats, and even those who are slow to understand us typically do a good enough job of treating us as well as they treat the average person.
I don't think it's possible to say there's nothing to fear. I think my feeling is more that letting that fear rule you is akin to joining the living dead. It's inflicting further suffering upon yourself when the world is already hostile to you. This isn't blame, this isn't judgment. This is informed by how difficult my life was when I was dealing with panic disorder.
The people who hate you want you to be afraid. They want you to feel like you are loathsome, sinful, disgusting. They want to injure you with a word or a fist and then they want you to keep injuring yourself in perpetuity. Reject that.
Easier said than done, of course. But it needs to be said because it needs to be done.
On another topic, Tekken's fine as usual. The weather has been hell on my joints, so playing is rough. But I've made it through every winter I've faced so far, and I'm only getting better at it. Whether or not I'm getting better at Tekken is another matter entirely. I am, but it's slow going.
Something I struggle with is rising to the challenge when I face opponents I know are tough. There is a real intimidation factor and in the face of that, I tend to second-guess myself and play less smoothly. And that's a killer. So I'm trying to develop a solid gameplan and solid fundamentals and drill them until it becomes second nature. It will, with work, in time.
Hang in there!